


Measure of a man: Book 1 firehouse love series

by Severidechicago1751



Series: Firehouse Love [1]
Category: Chicago Fire
Genre: Drug Addiction, F/M, Family, Friendship/Love, Gen, Multi, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-25
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2019-04-27 19:54:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 15,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14432934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Severidechicago1751/pseuds/Severidechicago1751
Summary: He had been demoted for the second time this time cause of his anger problems and attitude, Kelly Severide had found himself in a dark place again, he had been in this place since he lost shay all those years ago He had the chance of being a dad taking away from him not only once but twice. He has had failed relationship after relationship since his first love. He was known to everyone as the player but they didn't know the true Kelly Severide and some of the Dark secrets he carried with him.He doesn't care to find love and he seems lost in the darkness.Then she walked into Molly's one night, she was home his first love stood there in the bar. All the old feelings rushing back thoughts of him and her. She was his home the second girl he could talk to about who he really is the first having been Shay. Steph was home that's all he cared about or so he thoughtDisclaimer: the only character I own is my OC and her family. all other characters are own by Dick Wolf and Chicago Fire on NBC. Some storylines are also owned by Chicago fire. The man story line comes from my own idea from the song lyrics.





	1. Starting Over

Its been years since she saw the Chicago Skyline and here she was coming back working for the CFD., However it wasn't a sunshine kind of spot in the firehouse she has wanted to be in her whole life to follow in her Uncle and Father's foot steps. She was taking over for a lieutenant that had been demoted for a reason she felt was ridiculous., he was pulled from his rank over the several vacancies and turn over on his squad that were not his fault. She had listened to the chief explain as she sat there bored. She jumped at the sound of her name, "Steph are you even listening to me?!?!" her father Nick Hermann bellowed at her, yes he is the deputy chief of district 1 the district where 51 sat. "Yes dad I was listening to everything you had to say but I think you demoting Lieutenant Severide over some officer that is Butt hurt cause he spoke his mind is ridiculous." Steph regretted what she said as soon as it left her mouth.  
"Really young lady, you are going to tell me how to do my job!!!! you are still to young to understand any of this and if it was up to me you would have not the title of Lieutenant in anything."

"Yes sir!" Steph saluted her father as she left, she hated that she had to prove herself to her own father, your own father it echoed in her thoughts. Steph walked along the lake lost in her own thoughts as she rolled the lieutenant's name in her head that had been demoted. Kelly Severide, Kelly Severide, She felt like she knew him the name so familiar did her uncle talk about him did she grow up around him. Steph sighed as she continued on through the city having stopped by her apartment before going to Molly's this was a bar that her uncle owned with a few of his co workers. she loved how he said 51 was always like a family that much she remembered.

Let me give some background before we go further, my name is Steph Hermann, I grew up in Chicago my dad worked out of house 51 was Truck 81 Lieutenant and moved up in the ranks, his brother and 2 best friends were still at 51. Wallace is Chief, Mouch is still on truck and same with Uncle Hermann. Henry Mills had died in a fire and Benny Severide is working in Arson now he was Squad 3 Lieutenant. From what I know Peter Mills has left Chicago with his family, Mouch is now married to an awesome Police officer named Trudy and Uncle Hermann is happy with Aunt Cindy and there herd of kids as I love to call them. My god father Wallace is married with a child and I couldn't be more happy for him. My brother Eric is at 51 as Engine 51 Lieutenant, he lost his best friend Andy in a fire and he is best friends with the Truck Lieutenant Casey along with the Squad Lieutenant Kel-- I stop myself mid thought suddenly remembering why I knew his name.

Kelly Severide son of Benny youngest Lieutenant in CFD history, she knew him and more about him then most. You see Kelly and Steph had a past they dated he was her brother's best friend they had kept it secret he was her first and she was his. They broke up shortly before she left, there were no opening in the CFD at the time she graduated high school so she trained in NYC. 9-11 had been her reason she wanted to be a firefighter, she was in high school when it happened. So she got trained out there trained on squad and cross trained on ambo she worked on both for years. Because of her experience she was made lieutenant through the CFD after testing out. Now here she was and taking the spot of her Ex till he got it back, she sighed as she entered the bar man she really needed a drink at this point as she approached the bar her eyes locked with his Piercing blue eyes and she suddenly felt like the young 16 year old girl laying in his bed in his arms their relationship so wrong as he was 19 and her brother's best friend and practically grew up with him. Her breath hitched in her throat as she watched him approach and her name sounded so amazing from his lips. "Steph is that really you!!" He looked in her eyes and stepped closer. "Ya its me I am home." She smiled as he hugged her and whispered in her ear. "Yes baby you are home!" he held her close like they had not missed anytime as she looked in his eyes there was something she there that she couldn't shake he looked so sad and lost. He looked honestly vulnerable and there was a darkness there that scared her. She knew he had dated since her and was deemed the player from what she had heard from Eric and Hermann. He had gone through so much lost Andy, Shay and this was his second demotion in a year this one cause of his attitude and anger. If there was one thing she knew Kelly wasn't the angry guy that was his father. As he hugged her her mind wandered to growing up how he would climb into her window middle of the night. He was bruised and broken his father had beat the hell out of him again it was worse since his mom died, he would spend the night in her room with her and talked to her about everything he confided in her more then her brother, cause he wanted to keep that tough appearance to the guys so he would make up some story that he scrapped with some guy. 

As Steph looked at him now she saw that same boy from all those years ago but there was more pain behind those eyes. He had shay to talk to but since her passing he wouldn't say much to anyone about his feelings , or so her uncle had told her. So she knew he was bottling everything up again and going down the wrong path. Now she wondered how is she going to tell him why she is there and where she is working...She sighed knowing he was going to end up hating her once he knows,he may even distance himself from her making it harder to talk to him, but just for night she was going to let it be, she was going to find out what the truth was behind all his hurt.


	2. Truth and Lies

Kelly sighed to himself, here he was again at molly's sitting and having a beer depending on the day he would switch to his scotch but today it was beer. He looked around the bar seeing the people he called his family cause for him his Father Benny didn't give a damn about him his Mother was passed away and the only people he had was his half sister Katie and his best friend Erica but even they had their own lives. so for him firehouse 51 the intelligence officers from the 21st and the doctors and nurses from med were his family. Kelly watched all the couples, Adam had Kim and they were engaged, Casey had Dawson they had finally gotten married, Mouch finally found happiness and has Trudy. He continued to scan the bar his Ex Erin was newly married to Jay, Will and Natalie were finally together and his other Ex April had a new man in Ethan.Antonio was dating Erica, Cruz was seeing Brett his other Ex Missy had Mike a firefighter from station 23 and finally Otis was seeing his sister Katie. Kelly looked up at his best friend Stella and asked for another beer as she nodded and went to get it.

Kelly stayed lost in his thought yet for a moment, yes he had tried to find love he had dated around, Hell according to anyone that knew him he wore the title of player. Little did they know he wasn't the player they all thought, he was more of a big talker if anything. Yes he dated 17 girls, but he had only been serious about honestly 2 girls in his life. His ex fiancee Renee he loved her, but she had hurt him the most and cheated shortly before they got married so he called things off. He dated a second Renee ya he slept with her, but when she showed up pregnant and claiming it was his, part of him was thrilled he was going to be a dad. He had agreed to have a child with Shay but when that didn't happen and Renee showed back up she dangled this amazing thing in his face, only to rip it away and breaking his heart when he found out the baby was not his. People thought he had slept with every girl he dated but to be totally honest Kelly Severide was not that man he had only taken 5 girls in his line of women to share his bed. Nikki never made it to his bed she was his moment of weakness shortly after his engagement imploded and he had sex with her at the firehouse, something he honestly swore he would never do again. He of course shared his bed with the 2 Renee's since one was his fiancee and the second well he thought he loved. He also had shared his bed with Britney a woman he married shortly after having lost Shay when he was at another all time low, he came back from a trip married, they had both saved each other from pain they had suffered in losing people they loved. For him it was shay and for her it was her sister that died in a car accident that she caused, their marriage didn't last long as they got it annulled after a month. But the one girl he had shared his bed with was Steph, his best friend's sister he had loved her and honestly he still did. He dated Jamie, Zoya , a girl that was an ex who was a drug rep and he used her at the time he needed something, then there was 2 girls he met in a bar he saw a few times, he had dated shay's ex who wanted him in her bed, but he wanted nothing of that. He dated Alex she was an FBI agent that had helped with a few calls they had, there was Erin, missy ,April, Stella and Anna. Anna was the most recent he dated her yes , he loved her as a friend but he felt so sorry for her cause of her illness, she had cancer and he had donated marrow to try and save her, But instead he sat by her bedside as she passed away, yes he missed her but he never truly loved her like people thought. He was done dating Lawyers, Nurses and Cops, he was done with the random Bimbos.

The one thing people never knew about him that he kept hidden is the only titles he ever wanted to hold are of course Captain in the job, but in his personal life he wanted to have the title of Husband and Father. He had given up on ever thinking he would get those titles having let the one girl go that he could have had it all with, and his reasons for ending things were stupid they were distance and the age. Who was he kidding he never cared about both, he was more afraid he was going to be his Dad if they had gotten married.

Stella placed the beer down jolting Kelly from his thoughts he smiled and thanked her, he was glad he had a friend in Stella but she wasn't Shay, he missed her so much all the time but he never talked to other about it, Kelly was one of those guys that just kept everything inside. He sighed thinking maybe that is why he had been demoted for the second time and he might as well kiss his chances of ever being a Fire Captain goodbye, cause this time the demotion was his fault it was his attitude to a higher ranked officer, he was pissed on that call it happened he had an idea that would have saved the victim but the officer pulled rank and the person died, Kelly lost it on the guy and well said things he does regret now.He feared the one thing after it happened as he had almost hit the high ranked officer, he was him he was Benny. Now here he was demoted again he knew he had to get his act together but he felt he couldn't talk to Casey about everything going on, Kelly only had two people he could talk to about him an these feelings and that was Shay and his first love Steph.

Kelly took a deep breath and a long pull on his beer as he heard the door to Molly's open so he turned to see who the new person was entering the bar. His jaw dropped as he dropped the beer in his hand, sending it crashing to the bar as he saw her. Was he dreaming, was he seeing things he hadn't that much to drink tonight, their eyes met across the bar as he stood he remembered those blue green eyes of her's like they were his own. He mumbled an apology to Stella about the spilled beer but he was half way across the room to her, he needed to touch her to know she was real. His voices surprised even him as he spoke, "Steph is that you?" he smiled watching her as she responded to him "Ya its me I am home." she smiled back at hi, god he remembered why he fell in love with her. His arms wrapped her into a tight hug, he held her close to his chest to relishing in feeling her against him again. "Yes baby you are home!" He spoke to her holding knowing that she was home in his arms and he was home in hers. He wondered what brought her back home, but yet he didn't care all he knew was she was here, she was standing in front of him. For the first time in a long time Kelly Severide was happy he was content and felt he could let go finally and unburden himself to someone and here she was. He feared letting her go cause he thought she would disappear.

They were pulled from their moment the rest of the world had disappeared to them, when Hermann had yelled to him, "Would you stop hogging my niece and let me get in on the hugs!!" Hermann chuckled, he knew what Steph meant to Kelly and was happy to see him smiling. Kelly laughed his nervous laugh as she chuckled, but before heading to hug her uncle she turned to Kelly and said. "Let me go and talk to my Uncle and lets find a place to talk." He watched her walk over to the bar as he ordered another beer and Steph her favorite drink, he found a table and he sat waiting for her. They had so much to talk about most being his personal life him needing to get it off his chest, but maybe that wasn't for tonight, maybe that could wait. He watched her and couldn't help but smile again as he thought, Today my life is Complete my everything has come back to me, my heart is back.

But how was he going to handle the real reason she was back, would it tear them apart again and damage him even further.

The characters of Missy and Dana belong to me as Steph's sister and Erica Cruz belongs to BeckyJolene


	3. Shift can be Hell

Steph arrived at the Station early that morning she had seen Kelly last night at Molly's and now she waited for everything to explode in her face. She wondered if they were going to be able to keep everything separate.

The shift started and a meeting in the common room for introduction was how it started,Steph stood up front with Boden as he finally dropped the bomb on everyone. "Due to Lieutenant Severide's demotion which is temporary we have brought in a relief Lieutenant please everyone welcome to Firehouse 51 someone that has been in this family for awhile, Miss Steph Hermann." Kelly looked up at her and she saw the one look she feared she was going to see, sadness but that was mixed with hurt and anger, Steph sighed to herself as they were all dismissed she had the guys checking squad to make sure everything they needed for shift was there. She kept catching glares and looks from Kelly and would hear him snap snide remarks in her direction, she knew she had to put an end to this.

"Kelly can I see you in my quarters please!" Steph used a stern voice as he grumbled "You mean my quarters that you stole from me cause of your daddy!!" he glared as he walked past her. She entered the Lieutenant Quarters and shut the door her eyes meeting those of Kelly's. "I have had enough of the attitude Kelly, our personal relationship to each other does not come into this firehouse, I know your pissed about the demotion and that is not my fault so the attitude needs to stop toward me cause you did this to yourself." She watched as he sighed and the words that came from his mouth next stabbed her right in the chest his voice was so cold. "What personal relationship as far as I am fucking concerned you are dead to me just as dead as Shay, Andy and Anna. The only difference is you mean nothing. Yes I am pissed about this cause you took my job and got it cause of your father and you damn well know that." Kelly looked at her. "I will follow your instruction and direction at work and I will keep my nose clean to get my spot back and to make sure its fast so you can leave and get out of my life again." Kelly's words were cold and harsh, he watched her waiting for her response and when he didn't get one he asked her if he was dismissed and she nodded allowing him to leave her office.

Steph sat at her desk keeping her feeling at bay she was not going to let them overwhelm her and affect her job she was not going to be that girl!! The tones rang out through the station and off they went it was call after call for the station. Finally around 4 pm the calls had settled enough for the crews to get back to the station, Kelly sat playing cards with the squad guys before being called into dinner. Everyone ate together as a family minus one person and that was Steph , she needed the distance and needed to keep her head clear, she wasn't going to let things with Kelly cloud her judgement. Kelly had done what he said he listened to her and took orders from her as he promised, but that was as far as it went there was nothing more then that for them to talk.

It was 3 am when a call rang out for a house fire with the family still trapped inside, they all rushed to the call and Steph gave her orders to the guys, as Casey gave his to his men and Eric doing the same. They had cleared the building quickly and Steph found the final victim in the home a woman who appeared to be 36 weeks pregnant, the woman was down and Steph noticed she was not breathing, she called for Kelly's help as they got her out she helped the medics on start to work the mother. They got her into the back of the ambulance she gave control over to Capp as they rushed to Med, Steph helped Gabby in the back. They hadn't gotten a pulse back yet and they pulled into Med, Gabby gave the hand over report to Will Halstead and his team, Steph was still trying her hardest when the choice was made to end efforts but she couldn't stop this was wrong. She suddenly felt strong arms surround her and pull her away, she tried to fight against the arms when she heard his voice.

"Steph stop fighting, the battle is lost she is gone!' Kelly spoke the words in her ear, as they watched the doctor's do a crash c-section right there in the ER and when they didn't hear soft cries and watched as the doctor's stopped the efforts on the child she felt her knees give out from under her as she began to cry. She was not the only ones in tears after watching that and watching as they felt they failed this woman, her husband and her family. As a first responder it was the worst feeling in the world to fail someone you try and save, but it was human you couldn't save them all. She remembered the one thing she learned from a mentor she looked up to, the words echoed in her head. "We are here to do the job, we have the tools to save a person but the true choice is made by the maker, we are heroes to the community and the people but there are times we lose battles and we aren't superheroes we will fail more times then we will succeed in what we do." Those words always meant the world to her cause they are what kept her grounded to her job and she never got that superhero complex so many she worked with had.

They all got back to the station and it was almost time for shift to end as they worked a swing they were on 24 and off for 72. There were times they could pick up over time but the higher ups didn't want them doing more then 36 to 48 in a row as it would lead to burn out. Steph went to her office and began to write her report for the fire and an extra page to give to Dawson for the EMS report, she was lost in her work when she heard a light rapping on her door. She didn't look up from her papers and just waved the person in, she was lost in her work as she heard a mug get placed on her desk the smell of hot chocolate and coffee assaulting her senses, she smiled at the thought they he still knew how she liked that mix. She looked up her eyes meeting with his and a small smile played on his lips, he sat on the end of her bed as she turned in her chair to face him.

Steph took a breath before she spoke."Thank you for bringing me this Kelly I really needed it." She smiled at him as Kelly nodded. "Anytime today was a Shift from Hell for all of us!" he moved to place his hand on her leg when she stopped him. He looked at her a bit surprised that she moved away from him. "I have to get my report to Chief and Kelly you have already made it clear how you feel about us and that there is no us." Steph looked at him as he said he went to say how sorry he was when she stopped him again. "Don't ok! You meant what you said and as far as I am concerned whatever our issue is with each other it stays outside of this station. Personal problems do not belong in the work place we made that decision a long time ago when we were first together, before we broke up." Steph stood grabbing her things as she looked at a surprised Kelly. She looked at him and nodded, "Have a good 72 off Severide!" she spoke as she left, he watched her leave she rarely used his last name and he finally realized at that point he had made the biggest mistake he could and he needed to fix this, but how?


	4. Can time heal all the hurt

2 months later...

Time had passed since the shift from hell, and the words Kelly spoke to Steph that had cut her so deep. She had been having trouble sleeping since that shift and found herself sleep deprived more often then not, she knew why the girl they weren't able to save reminded her of her friend's wife in NYC, he had lost her and their child the same way the only difference was it was arson and the fire was set by him, He had found out that his wife cheated and the baby wasn't even his. 

Steph had to hand in her final report today of Kelly's performance over the last few months, she had noticed his temper had gotten better and he didn't as unstable as he first was. She walked into her father's office and handed him the report, he smiled and nodded to his daughter, he was glad to get one of his best lieutenant's back in the rotation that shift, but he knew it was going to be hard for Steph to be transferred from 51 after today. She was staying on today and filling in for Gabby on ambo since Gabby was out due to a family emergency. 

She walked into the station and was dressed in her Paramedic uniform, this uniform she felt the most comfortable in, this was the job she knew. She was still a lieutenant but this time she over saw EMS rather then Squad, her job as the EMS lieutenant differed from a normal PIC as she checked all the reports from the district before they went to the ivory tower. Boden called the early morning briefing to make his announcements, Steph sat up front with Brett and Kelly stood in the back next to Casey. His eyes landed on Steph , they hadn't talked since that shift about their personal relationship, they had limited talking to about work when on shift and that was all the interaction they have had. 

Boden smiled as he started the meeting, "First I would like to thank Steph for filling in today for Gabby who is out with her family!" everyone clapped and they were glad she was still there. "However today will be her last shift with us, as she is taking a transfer to house 42 downtown to Ambo 42. Which brings me to congratulating Kelly Severide for coming back as Squad 3 lieutenant!!! it is nice to have you back in command!" Kelly smiled he was happy to be back in command, but he wasn't happy about Steph leaving them after today. Boden dismissed everyone to start the shift and as they moved to exit the room the last two left in the room were Kelly and Steph. Kelly shut the door blocking Steph's way out so she couldn't escape him. 

"Steph it has been 2 months and we haven't talked, you have no idea how much I have hated myself for saying what I did to you that day. I was mad I was hurt and I felt betrayed by the one person I loved, the one person I only loved." his hand touched her shoulder, as she sighed she pulled out of his touch. "I know how long it has been Kelly and I don't want to talk about this here ok!" she stepped back a bit from him as he sighed slightly. "This is our job Kelly and our personal lives stay out of work. just like you and shay said home stays home and work stay at work." She looked in his eyes and he could see how tired she was. He nodded agreeing with her, "Ok then after shift can we do breakfast?" He asked hoping she would agree and she nodded. "Sure that's fine and we can clear the air then." He smiled at her then took her hand in his stopping her once more. "You look exhausted is everything ok I know that Hermann said that you have not been sleeping well!" He looked at her concerned and worried about her health and well being. She hated this about him, is he knew her and when something was bothering her, but she couldn't lie to him. She nodded her head looking back in his eyes, "He is right I have not been sleeping well I have been reliving that call cause it reminds me of a call that happened in NYC that was the same thing." she sighed hating how it haunted her calls with kids always haunted her. Kelly pulled her in hugging her tight to him, he was surprised when she tensed to his touch, he released her and touched her jaw. "You know I am always here for you if you need to talk, I have always been here and always will be just like you were for me!' She nodded looking in his eyes. "I know, and the same goes for you!" Kelly nodding knowing he still needed to talk to her about everything that had been bothering him, that cause his anger problems that he kept pushed away to get back to his job. He couldn't really say he was over what he did, but he was more careful. 

The tones rang out calling ambo for a call on the west side in a rough area of town, Steph headed out joining Brett in the ambo as they headed out on the call. They arrived a few minutes later on scene to what looked like an abandoned home. They approached the door having informed main they believed the call was a hoax, "I think some kids called this in, this place looks empty." Steph spoke to Brett, as Brett headed back toward to ambulance with the gear, Steph grabbed her radio calling to main: "Main ambo 61 will be clearing this was a hoax call!" just as Amy let go of the mic pain exploded in her head, as she heard a scream in the distance she went to yell for Brett when the darkness took her away, she felt her body being carried inside what they thought was an empty home as she passed out hearing several men saying they got the medics to help their friends.

Hours pass and Casey enters Boden's office Severide hot on his heels, "chief 61 has still not returned from that last call and they cleared with main 4 hours ago." Casey began as Boden looked between his two officers. "Have you tried to reach them by phone?" Boden asked as Severide nodded, "Both phones went straight to voicemail!' "Load up boys and take a ride!" Boden instructs them to do having given them the address of the call. Squad and Truck pull up to find 61 sitting there lights still on and everything gear wise and medications still inside, but the two Medics missing, their radios on the ground along side their phones. Kelly picked up Steph's phone seeing an old picture of them together as her screen, when he heard Capp and Cruz call to him and Casey. They found tire marks coming from the driveway and drops of blood were noted in the snow. The worst they feared was being noticed, "Call intelligence both our Medic have been kidnapped!" Casey looks at Kelly who looks back down at Steph's phone in his hand, he felt the tear unshed in his eyes as he wondered if he was ever going to get to set it right or if the time the lost didn't heal the pain and now he lost her for good. He stormed off to squad he was slowly losing control of his anger and he needed to separate himself from it all before something happened. 

After turning it over to intelligence Kelly found himself sitting in his office, his blinds closed as he let the tears fall. The only other time he very felt the pain he is feeling at this moment was when he lost Shay, he needed a release he needed to forget as he pulled the vial of medication from his pocket get got off the ambo on his way back to squad, he drew it up like he had done all those years ago. He pulled the cap from the needle and pushed it into the muscle of his upper arm and let it take him away just for the moment, the familiar high came over him and he finally let go of the hurt. He knew at that moment he needed her, he was already self destructing again and would lose it all if anyone found out what he just did, he needed her!!!

 

Let me know what you guys think of this story so far, I am going to touch on some hard subject matter such as drug addiction and abuse in first responders due to hard times and PTSD and I will also touch on PTSD...


	5. Ghosts of Past and Present!

It has been 3 days since Brett and Steph had gone missing, Intelligence had a few hits on the gang that had taken the girls'. Kelly had found himself high more times then he cared to count as of recent but no one was any the wiser about it, his mood was mellow and he was really keeping to himself. He was getting the meds from a doctor saying his shoulder ha been acting up again, an granted it was he maybe didn't need the meds he was given.

It was 2 pm on this Friday they were on shift, when they heard rumbling over the radios and they got called out to assist intelligence at a home breech. They had called in SWAT for their snipers. Everyone loaded up and head out to the address that was given, when they arrived on the scene Voight walked over to Boden. "We pinged the phones of one of the guys to this house and we think the girls are inside!" Boden nodded, "We will be ready with whatever you guys need." the men nodded to each other and Kelly secretly was happy he hadn't taken those pills when he wanted to hoping they would soon have the girls back.

They watched as a female figure set up on the roof able to get a clear look into the building. Kelly knew who it was it was Steph sister Dana and he knew she would get the girls out safe.

Steph groaned she was in so much pain her head hurt along with her jaw and ribs, Steph had been the mouthy one so they wouldn't hurt Brett. The girls were kept in separate rooms so they couldn't even see if the other was ok. Brett was in the back bedroom and she knew she wasn't as hurt as Steph, they had used Brett as the girl to patch up their buddy and they had treated her well. Brett opened the window quietly knowing the guys were busy in the basement as she crawled from the window having seen the lights. As her feet hit the ground she found herself in the arms of Antonio Dawson and she hugged him as he held her close, he was a welcomed sight for her to see. As Antonio approached around the side with Brett, Gabby and Stella came running to her checking her over noticing her injuries were minor.

Kelly glared, "Don't you guys have eyes on Hermann yet!!!" he growled at the officers as Jay walked over to him. "Dude chill we have a location and we are going to enter and bring her out!" Kelly wanted to hit Jay so bad for acting so laid back about it. Minutes later which had felt like hours gunfire rang out some of the pops were quiet which Kelly figured was from Dana she had her silencer on,he heard her voice over the radio, "leader is down I repeat Leader is down send in the team for rescue." In Dana's voice Kelly heard confidence and pride that she did her job, he made a note to thank her later. The team came out and one by one they had a gang member in custody. Kelly looked up as he watched Adam carrying Steph from the house, he ran over to him to take her away from him as Adam carried her to the stretcher. Kelly ran to her, he tried to take her hand as Gabby stopped him, her and Stella loading her into the ambulance quickly.

Steph was half awake and partially with it, her body ached and her head hurt so bad, she began to wonder has it always hurt this bad or has it just been recent it got worse. Her mind was going so fast, her eyes rolled back as she began to have a seizure. Stella grabbed the meds to stop the seizure pushing the 5 mg of ativan into the IV they started, Kelly watched scared out of his mind. He needed to know what was going on, why was she seizing, it was then he heard Gabby, "She has blood in her hair looks like she took the butt of a gun to her head a few times." Gabby was assessing her and she noted out loud that she had a blown pupil. Stella got out hoping up front as they drove quickly to Med, Kelly looked at his guys "LOAD UP WE ARE GOING TO MED!!!!" he didn't care how he sounded at that time. They walked into Med and Kelly walked up to Maggie, he got the room number to where She was admitted and he entered slowly.

She was laying in bed, she looked fragile, she was pale her head wrapped but he could still see the blood in her blonde hair, he walked to the bed sitting down as he took her hand in his. He couldn't fight it anymore and he started to sob his hands grasping her one hand as he laid his head on his hands the tears falling down his face. Erica knew this was the wrong time to confront him, but she slowly walked into Steph's room and looked at the broken man in front of her, he was a mess and no one knew what this girl meant to him. She cleared her throat as Kelly looked up and she asked, "Kelly are you high!" Kelly looked in her eyes and he was ready to lie I mean he was talking to Erica not Steph. Kelly's head betrayed him as he nodded, Erica sat next to him, "Kelly I know what she means to you, you once told me about her and I saw how you loved her, and you became my best friend,but Kelly I am telling you now she needs all of you and she needs you off the meds." Erica watched as he looked up and nodded his voice barely a whisper, "I am its just when this all happened and I said something to her I didn't mean my past came out of no where and took hold I couldn't fight it anymore." He cried as she hugged him. "We are all here for you and I will make sure you get through this for her and I know she will make sure you make it through." Erica nodded as he thanked her, his secret was safe with her, but she knew he needed help and he needed Steph for that.

Kelly sat at her bedside, the nurse were in and out checking vitals and checking on her, he had requested time off and it was granted his co workers were great and gave him sick days so he could be there. He had also come clean and was receiving the help he needed while he stayed at her bedside. He refused to leave her side, he had just dozed off finally when he feel a slight squeeze on his hand, he sat up and his blue eyes met her blue green eyes. He stood quickly crashing his lips on hers, as they broke the kiss she looked at him, and what she said next is what knocked him on his ass.

"Shay says Hi!"


	6. Nightmares and Problems

Few days later.....

Steph has been staying with Kelly for 24 hours, as Hermann didn't want her alone in her apartment above his garage since the kidnapping knowing she was going to have issues dealing, and she hadn't really been sleeping she had been having some rough nightmares about the kidnapping and things that happened and could have happened. Kelly had not said much to her but he stayed with her in the hospital and was very distracted since she came home.

Steph knew that the problem had to be from her mention of Shay, she found herself cleaning the apartment and it was 4 am as she was cleaning. Steph came across several empty vitals of meds, pain meds to be exact and she sighed remembering his past. She was scared now of what was going on in Kelly's head to go back to this, he had been doing so well.

At 6 am Kelly got up and started to get ready for shift, he felt hung over he had been dulling the pain he felt remembering shay and dealing with other things with the meds, he reached for the last vial he had and was pissed when he didn't find it.

"Looking for this?" Steph glared holding the vial in her hand, her upset with him as he turns biting his lip. "Steph you don't get it, I had to dull the pain of all of these memories of Shay and then everything with you having been kidnapped!" He tried to defend himself as she glares at him. "This isn't the way to do it and you know that you need help Kelly you slipped down your rabbit hole!!!" She was upset but she was worried for him cause in all honesty she loved him.

"PLUS I COULDN'T TAKE THE PAIN OF WHAT I SAID TO YOU AND I WANTED TO FIX THINGS AND THEN YOU WERE TAKEN!!!" He shouted as she stopped in her tracks the truth was finally out, he had finally said it. She closed the distance between them, "Kelly I have thought about those words and yes they hurt and I had made the choice to forgive you for them, but this the meds is not the way to handle it, you need rehab this time!" Kelly nodded as he began to cry, she pulled him tight into his arms holding him. "I will be right here waiting for you when you come out Kelly and so will the rest of the firehouse family." she kissed the top of his head and he snuggled in tight. He sat with her for the longest time them just being there for each other, he got up and began to pack a bag, as he came out of his bedroom he saw her waiting for him.

"Alright I am ready to go!" Kelly sighed as she took his hand he looked at her, "You can stay here if you want while I am there." She smiled at him, "I will certainly do that!" She smiled, "Kelly maybe you won't be there long but you need to be clean to do the job and for us to ever have a future together to ever fix things." Kelly knew she was right, as they drove to the firehouse to explain everything they again just sat in silence her holding his hand and them just thinking. Chief took the news well and he was glad she was able to get through to him and get him the help he needed, the whole firehouse rallied around Kelly and he was grateful for this family he had!

Steph dropped him off and had walked him into the rehab center, he didn't want to let go he just wanted to hold her in his arms in this embrace when they parted her smiled softly kissing him. "I will be waiting for you, you have my word Kelly, I am not giving up on you or us! not this time!!!" She smiled as he kissed her again and they parted ways for what Kelly thought was going to be like forever....

2 months later......

Hermann is waiting outside the rehab center to pick up Kelly, he was the one that was going to have to tell him about Steph and everyone was afraid of how he would react..

Kelly came out and looked at Hermann slightly confused as to why he was here, "Where is Steph is everything ok?" Kelly needed to know if she was alright. "Kelly get in and we will head to your place! you looking much healthier by the way!" Hermann smiled as Kelly got in he was starting to feel even more uneasy as they drove. "Hermann please I need to know did Steph wait for me is she ok!?!" Kelly watched him, "She is waiting for you, but she had filled in your spot while you were out Kelly and they had some tough calls she hasn't been sleeping well at all for the last 5 months and I am sure you noticed her being exhausted!" Hermann began as Kelly nodded listening. "Kelly. Steph has PTSD and she has been having night terrors and issues sleeping, we have all been taking turns staying with her lately at your place, but she has been worried about you and wanting you!" Hermann sighed not wanting to make him feel bad.

Kelly nodded, he was glad he got the help he needed, but he hated he wasn't there for her, she had always been there to pick up the pieces when he fell apart, but cause he slipped up he wasn't there when she needed him. He walked into the apartment and noticed Dana was there and Steph was sleeping on the couch. "How is she today?" Hermann asked as Dana sighed, "Got her to take her sleeping pill and she has finally been sleeping since 3 am." Dana looked at the time seeing it was now noon. Kelly hugged Dana thanking her for helping Steph as they left that when Kelly saw it she was pale and thin, her hands were bruised and she had dark circles around her eyes. He knew right then and there she needed him and he was not about to let her down not this time. He wanted to fix them and get her back in his life and he was going to do it, he was going to get his happily ever after.


	7. maybe its better we are friends

3 months later....

Steph and Kelly have both been doing so much better the therapy has really helped, also Steph had found someone who understood her pain and had found a safe harbor in Stella. The girls talked a lot Steph found herself meeting up with Stella almost as much as she met with Dr Charles. Steph worked through her problems and Kelly hasn't felt the urge to ever slip again. Steph and Kelly got an apartment together and they had separate rooms, They hadn't exactly talked about getting back together, she knew how she felt and she was pretty sure she knew how Kelly felt. 

Steph was making breakfast when she heard him come in from his run, then she heard a second voice a female a little blonde thing, Steph knew her she was Brett's friend Hope and Steph instantly felt sick. She told him them living together shouldn't change the way he is and I guess it wasn't. She watched as they headed to his room together her knowing they were going to hit the showers. 

She heard her giggle as they came out an hour later, Steph getting her bag. "I am heading in Kelly so you and umm Bimbo Blondie have fun your going to be late and I won't cover for you." Steph can't help how harsh that sounded as he goes to say something as the door slams. she felt like she had been punched in the gut. She got to the station as she was filling in for Dawson again and heard the girl was the new secretary helping Connie, she looked at Brett as she looked as shocked as everyone else and Steph couldn't help but giggle at Kelly's expense. This fling was coming to bite him in the ass and she was loving every minute of it. 

The Crews were busy the rest of the shift, as Hope walked up to Steph. "Hey I am so sorry about this morning Kelly didn't tell me he had a room mate or anything it won't happen again cause I have decided to tell him that cause I am here I want to make it on my own merit and I can't see him." Hope smiles at Steph as she laughs, "Listen Princess I really don't care if you date him screw him or what have you!" "As well as making it on your own merit just watch yourself around here this is a family and we protect our own. Also your Brett's friend you already haven't made it on your own merit," Steph walks away not wanting to deal with this girl. 

Later that night at molly's Steph is sitting with Stella talking, none of them trusting Hope and how she is her seeming shady. "I love Brett as a sister but please Stella tell me you got information on this Hope bitch cause she is going to screw someone over!" Steph looks at Stella "I hate to agree but I agree." the girls heard Brett, "Really you both are judging her is this cause she slept with Kelly and you both did to and cause you still have feelings for him." Steph felt Brett's eyes on her, as she rolls her. "No it's cause the girl is shady as hell!" Steph couldn't help but say. Brett went to lose it on Steph as Kelly walk over pulling her away. Steph jerks her arm away from him as they are outside. 

"What the hell Severide!" She never called him by his last name unless she was pissed. "I didn't want you to make a complete fool of yourself I didn't know that was a crime." Kelly looked at her. Steph slightly growled thinking as they head out, them getting back to the apartment her looking at him. "I don't get you Kelly you tell me how much you love me and everything 3 months ago and now your screwing this bimbo?!?!? let me guess you just spoke nice words to try and get me back in your bed, to say nice things cause we were both battling demons??" She spits venomously at him. 

"No I do love you, its just I don't know I was trying not to think about you and I cause I feared messing it up if we got together!!!" Kelly tried to defend himself and him mad at himself cause he still loves Steph more then life. "Well I am still in love with you and I never stopped and I am sorry if you did Kelly, but you know something maybe it's better if we are just friends." The words burned her tongue and punched Kelly in the gut, he tried to reach for her as she pulled away and he once again felt as if he was losing everything, his world but mostly a piece of his heart. 

Steph walked away to her room leaving him to stand alone in the living room to his thought as she felt the tears begin to fall, she thought maybe she should run and began to pack a bag, when she turned to leave her door was open and Kelly was standing there tears in his eyes as he stepped forward grabbing her jaw kissing her passionately and pinning her to the wall, he took her breath away like he always had. He held her there, as they both tried to catch their breath his lips inches from hers, They hadn't made love in the time she had come back and he hated he was with Hope but there was a secret there as to way he did. Kelly spoke before pressing his lips to Steph's again as he locked his eyes with her, "I can't just be friends with you, that would never work cause I want you to much, and I can't lose you again." Those words alone took Steph's breath away.

He left the room leaving her to think, she felt alone. Then she began to wonder did he really love her, she put her bag down and headed to bed..

Across the apartment Kelly laid back in his bed thinking, how could he be so stupid to let this hope girl get the better of him. She had threatened to ruin his career over something that didn't happen, if he didn't sleep with her... He knew it was wrong but it would have been he said she said like it was with tara and they would use his past against him...once again he felt like the lyrics of a song...

"Broken down he's lost everything!"  
Right now Kelly Severide felt that way more then anything...


	8. Love is what made me stay

It had been 2 months since that night that Kelly said he could no longer be her friend, she found herself thinking about it a lot and realizing that she didn't want him as her friend she wanted him as her forever and her love again. she realized how much she missed him and being in his arms, was the safest place she could ever be. Yes he added another girl to his list it was Hope, but she was now long gone and he told Steph he wanted to clear the air about that. 

Shift had ended and it was later afternoon She was in her room when he knocked on her door, Steph answered and he smiled. "I was hoping I could take you to dinner tonight? We still have a lot to talk about and discuss." He smiled and I nodded. "Yes I told you that I would give you a chance to clear the air about that bimbo and bad choice." Steph didn't like her and everyone knew it cause hope was a liar and skank. 

So Steph got ready for her date, Kelly and I hadn't been on a date in well years so I had to look my best. So I chose something new I had just gotten. 

 

I came out from my room and I saw him standing there in his suit, my god he looked stunning and amazing, that color, his eyes and that hair, he was for sure my Silver fox. 

 

he took my hand and we headed out, as he helped me into his newer camaro, we headed toward downtown to a very prestige steakhouse, he had made reservations for us. He let the valet park the car and he took my hand leading me inside, we got a table by the window and there were roses sitting at my place. Kelly Severide had a dozen fire and Ice roses waiting for me at dinner, he certainly was still the romantic I remembered. 

 

We sat for hours talking, an that was when he told me all about the Hope incident, how she had told him is he didn't sleep with her she would have accused him of sexual assault, she knew what that was really like do to the kidnapping but she left that behind her. We were holding hands as we talked and before we knew it the place was closing. We decided to take a walk along the river on the river walk for a bit. When Kelly surprised her and came out of no where, "The reason why I wanted to take you out tonight is I know your birthday is tomorrow and we have shift so I wanted us to have one special moment." He pulled a box from his pocket and handed it to Steph, as she opened the box inside was a beautiful necklace, I had tears in my eyes and smiled. "Yes Kelly my heart belong to you and always will, I want to give us a chance again, but this time I don't want to let you go." she smiled as he kissed her softly. "I am not letting go either and I am so glad you are mine!" 

 

They had gotten back to the apartment and they both changed into PJ's, Steph decided to wear something a bit sexy for him. 

 

Kelly smiled at what he saw in front of him, as they kissed making their way to his room, rose pedals were everywhere, they got into bed, when Kelly again surprised her even more. his lips crushed against hers again as he pulled back. "Your sexy as hell in that outfit, but with us having just got back together I want to take time before we sleep together again." he bit his lip nervous and she leaned in kissing him and smiled. "You have changed Kelly Severide and I have to say I am even more in love with this man." she smiled and curled into his chest as he kissed her head, she looked up at him and surprised him. "Kelly I would never change jobs I love what I do and I love being here with you, I stayed here cause of the job and cause of love of you. I want you to know I would chose you and forever and a family with you over any career, if I was asked to leave tomorrow to a different house for us to be married, I would for us and a forever." She feel asleep safe in his arms for once she felt safe. 

Kelly laid holding her watching as she slept, he reached over and looked at the ring in the box in his night stand knowing it would be her's some day he had bought it years ago when they were first together and this time he was going to give it to her, and make her his wife some day. But he wanted to take things slow and prove to those he isn't that player anymore and never was. 

 

she was his and would be always and forever, he wasn't letting go this time or ever again.


	9. I need your help

3 months have passed.....

Kelly was true to his word, they had been taking things slow, she had only stayed in his bed that one night of her birthday, Valentines he took her to dinner at Navy pier and they said good night and went to their separate rooms that night. They had slept separately now for the past 3 months and Kelly was not about to rush anything. 

Kelly had asked Dana , Steph's older sister to meet him for lunch, he needed her help. He smiled as she walked up and he stood pulling out her chair. "Kelly being a gentleman now I know your buttering me up." Dana laughed

Dana knew how Kelly was back in the day, and needless to say she wasn't happy to hear he was back in her sister's life, but she was giving him a chance. All of them had grown up together, in the same neighborhood.

Kelly smiled as she sat down, "Ok you asked me to lunch cause you need my help, what did you screw up already?" Dana teased him as she sipped her water. "I didn't screw anything up" Kelly kind of growled and stuck his tongue out at her. 

 

Dana Laughed at his goofiness," Ok seriously though, I want to ask Steph to marry me in the next few months and I need your help in planning the most amazing proposal,: Kelly smiled nervously, as Dana shook her head, "You are asking your girls sister to help you propose to the girl you let go of years ago!!" he nodded sheepishly and Dana chuckled again. "Ok I will help you but I am going to have to figure out a way to throw my sister off." Dana stood up from lunch as Kelly leaned in hugging her an noticed something different. "Yes I am still where my vest from shift." Dana sighed Kelly smiled and Dana smiled her touching his jaw, "She has changed you hasn't she, she was always the girl you wanted never any one else hub?" Kelly sighed looking at her, "I am so sorry I hurt her in the past, but I swear I won't do it again. Dana chuckled as she looked into his eyes, "You better not cause honestly Kelly I don't think I could pick up those pieces again if you break her, plus I would make you dosappear." She closed the door and headed back to work. Kelly was grateful she was helping him out. 

Kelly headed back to the apartment and smiled as he saw Steph napping on the couch, they had the last few days off and she had been sleeping so much better. He smiled as she sat up and looked at him rubbing her eyes. "Oh hey Kelly how was lunch with Dana?" Steph smiled as he looked at her confused, "She texted me so no one could start anything!" Steph chuckled loving that she had such a awesome sister and that her and Kelly were able to be friends. 

"It was good, I was glad to talk to her I hadn't had the time to talk to her in a while and it was nice." Kelly smiled. "you had been spending so much time with her lately I was beginning to wonder if I was ever going to get you to myself." Kelly laughed as steph hit him with a pillow and he pulled her down into his arms and kissed her. It was nights like this they loved being playful and loving...


	10. Perfect!

In all this time Kelly couldn't believe it, it had been a year since Steph had come back, a year since they struggled to make it through difficult times. Even more to his surprise they had been dating the last 9 months, Kelly had enlisted the help of Dana to make this night simply perfect.

Dana and Steph had been spending the day shopping and Dana insisted that Steph get a brand new dress for tonight. Steph had agreed and she bought a dress for a date Kelly had planned and it being their anniversary she knew it had to be something major. Steph came out of the dressing room and looked at Dana, "Well what about this one?" Steph asked 

 

Dana turns looking at Steph in the dress she came out in, "I don't know it's cute.... But I think this dress is what you need!" Dana smirked at she handed Steph a beautiful formal dress. "You know two things, First I never thought he could be best friends with my sister. My very overprotective sister" Steph smiled "Second you look freaking threatened to make him disappear seriously" Steph heads into the dressing room, hearing Dana laugh. "Dana I don't know about this one!!" Steph came out adjusting the dress a bit. 

 

Steph stood looking at herself in the mirror as Dana smirked. "Perfect!!! that is absolutely perfect!!" Dana and Steph check out her having grabbed a few things and they went to their respective homes. Steph got dressed when she heard a knock on the door, Dana walked in with a friend of hers to do Steph's hair and make up. "So where is Bosco?" Steph was curious as Dana laughed "He is helping Kelly out getting everything set up!!" 

It was 8 pm and Dana and Steph arrived at Willis Tower, they headed up to the Skydeck and as Steph stepped off the elevator her breath was taken away. It was beautifully decorated and filled with her and Kelly's family and friends, People from district 21, firehouse 51 and med. The sky deck never looked so beautiful. 

 

 

Kelly smiled as he saw the girls come in and he took the stage that was set up, he looked amazing in his suit... 

 

"Everyone thank you so much for coming tonight, I am glad to be surrounded by family and friends for this special night. Steph and I are celebrating our 9 month anniversary today having been dating since rebuilding our relationship and its been a year since she came back into my life. Steph was my first love that I should have never let go!" "tonight is to celebrate love and forever!" Kelly smiled as Ed Sheeran took to the stage. 

"Congrats to Kelly and Steph and I was thrilled when Missy gave me a call to help out tonight and perform., especially for such a beautiful love story" 

Steph smiled as Kelly walked over to her taking her into his arms dancing as Ed Sheeran began to sing the song "Perfect." 

I found a love for me  
Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead  
Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet  
Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me

'Cause we were just kids when we fell in love  
Not knowing what it was  
I will not give you up this time  
But darling, just kiss me slow  
Your heart is all I own  
And in your eyes you're holding mine

Baby, I'm dancing in the dark  
With you between my arms  
Barefoot on the grass  
Listening to our favorite song  
When you said you looked a mess  
I whispered underneath my breath  
But you heard it,  
Darling, you look perfect tonight

Well, I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know  
She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I'll share her home  
I found a love to carry more than just my secrets  
To carry love, to carry children of our own

We are still kids but we're so in love  
Fighting against all odds  
I know we'll be alright this time  
Darling, just hold my hand  
Be my girl, I'll be your man  
I see my future in your eyes

Steph smiled in his arms the Skyline beautiful out the windows. 

 

She is listening to the versus that is being sung, when she feels Kelly stop and he took her breath away for the second time tonight as she looked down at him, he had sunk to one knee and a black box open in his hands. "Baby I think the first few lines of this song said it all We were just Kids when we fell in love and I never stopped loving you from those days. You make me whole so Stephanie Marie Hermann will you please do me the honor of being my wife!!" Kelly smiled as tears fell own Steph's cheeks as she cried nodding her head. "Yes Kelly a million times yes!!!" Kelly smirked sliding the ring on her hand as wrapping her back in his arms. 

 

As Ed Sheeran sang the rest of the song Steph enjoyed the feeling of being in Kelly's arms, this was the only place she ever thought of as home. 

Baby, I'm dancing in the dark  
With you between my arms  
Barefoot on the grass  
Listening to our favorite song  
When I saw you in that dress  
Looking so beautiful  
I don't deserve this  
Darling, you look perfect tonight

Baby, I'm dancing in the dark  
With you between my arms  
Barefoot on the grass  
Listening to our favorite song  
I have faith in what I see  
Now I know I have met an angel in person  
And she looks perfect  
I don't deserve this  
You look perfect tonight

As the song finished, Kelly and Steph made their way through the crowd being congratulated and hugged the rest of the night, Steph walked over and hugged Dana and Missy in her arms, "Thank you so much for all of this and for helping Kelly plan this." Steph smiled tears in her eyes as her sisters hugged her again, "Kelly told us how much you really meant to him and how he changed, and every time he would mention you name we saw the love he had for you, he never got over you and we couldn't stand in the way of that." Her sister's smiled  
"So we wanted to help him capture is forever and never let it go again!!" The girls embraced once more. As the night came to a close Steph and Kelly walked along the lake hand in hand, he pulled her close to him as he kissed her softly. "Let's go home and cuddle!" He smiles as she nods. 

As they walk into the apartment she slips into his blackhawks jersey and he was in his sweatpants, they sat on the couch together watching a movie. Steph had fell asleep on his chest and he kissed her head. Kelly picked her up bridal style as she curled into him carrying her to what would be there bed soon enough, he laid her down and she curled into the bed and into him. Kelly smiled and held her against his chest the night had been Perfect and he had everything he ever wanted right in this moment. The only thing he feared is what could take it away!


	11. wedding planning

It had been 2 months since Kelly's beautiful proposal and a lot has happened. There have been questionable fires going on throughout the city and the FBI had to be brought into handle the problem and they had placed agents throughout the city. The two placed at 51 have both impacted Steph and Kelly's lives quite a bit. One was special agent Erica Cruz sister to Joe Cruz and well Kelly's best friend. Though Erica was just a friend she considered Kelly a brother cause of Cruz and she was fiercly protective of her best friend and his heart..

However when Steph met Erica that introduction was a bit rough, Kelly was in her office talking with her when Steph was called in and the door shut, that is when the questions started such as why did you break if off with Kelly years ago? Why did you come back to him now? Do you love him? then she brought out a file and had actually looked her up. The whole conversation happened while her gun was visible. Needless to say it was nerve wrecking, but now the two girls were best of friends.

It was around 10 am when Erica knocked on the door of their house and Steph answered it revealing the group of girls on the other side, Dana was there and, Stella, Brett, Gabby, Missy and Katie. Erica had a bag in her hands as the girls walked in. "Ok so since I figured we are going out and checking out things for the wedding and having a girls day, I brought t-shirt's that I thought would be awesome yo wear today and the day of the wedding. Erica opened the box and started handing each girl their shirt.

 

Steph smirked and slightly chuckled. "Erica they are perfect especially since the one is fire squad!!" Steph hugs her tight thanking her. Steph looks at Missy, "Where are those cute babies of yours I could have used a baby cuddle or two." Steph smiles as Missy chuckles "They are having a day with daddy so mommy could hang out with adults." She chuckled. "Don't get me wrong I love them but I don't think Mike cared for the baby talk in the bedroom last night!" The girls all start laughing so hard as they gather their things to head out. First stop was the florist to order the flowers. They girls sat looking through books as Dana stumbled on flowers for the guys. "Steph these look perfect for the guys to have on their blues." Dana turned the book to face the girls and pointed to the rose.

 

Steph smiles, "That is perfect!!" "I think I found my bouquet" Steph turns the book showing the girls.

 

The girls continue to look though the books when they are all looking and stumble on the same picture all of them saying, "Wedding party Flowers!"

 

The girls laugh, as they look for the center pieces and Stella finds the perfect ones showing the girls.

 

it's simple and perfect Steph and Kelly having decided for one to not have huge center pieces, they had talked about having the wedding ceremony at the Fire house with the reception at the Fire academy. The girls then head to the bridal shop Steph watching each of them go off in different directions, while Steph talks to Missy about the flower girl dress for Bethany . "So I hope your ok with it, but I saw this dress and I fell in love with it." Steph smiles at them as the lady brings the dress out.

 

Missy smiles chuckles. "That is the cutest dress for them and for the theme of the wedding!!!" Missy smiles at her as she pulls Steph into hug, Taylor will be carrying a sign saying Here comes the bride as well as the pillow. The girls had come back and joined Missy and Steph by this time as they all say what a cute idea. Steph shows the girls the ring bearer pillow that Kelly himself picked out. Along side the little flower girl basket that Steph picked out.

 

 

The girls aww in unison and love both of them when Erica pipes up. "Wait Kelly picked out the pillow please say we can give him a hard time about that!!!" She smirks with the other girls grinning and nodding. "Oh girls come on, he has a sensitive side when he wants to!!" Steph chuckles as the girls beg "Please!!" Steph laugh "Ok maybe a little!!"

Erica smiles her mischievous smile and that when Steph knows she is in trouble. "So Brett and I picked out a set of garters each one is a fun one and well the other would be more your style and well you get to guess who picked which one!!" Erica grins holding them up.

The girls all start laughing out loud as Steph looks between the choices. "Ok I am saying Brett picked out the first one and Erica knowing you, you picked out the second!" Steph laughs as Erica tries to give her this shocked hurt look then sighs. "Just to think we have only known each other 2 months and you know my humor so well!!" Erica laughs as Steph looks at them. "Ok lets get down to the business of the dresses I think my Maids of honor should go first. Yes that is you Dana and Erica!!!" Steph smirks as they both get up to get fitted, once they are fitted they step out to the others giving cat calls and whistling as Dana and Erica are posing and being sexy. Steph having picked out a dress for the two to stand out as her right and left hand girls. She chose them cause Erica is Kelly's best friend. Then Dana is her big sister and best friend, who has helped her more then anyone would know especially with the PTSD.

 

"These are perfect for you two!!" Steph smiled as the girls agreed, Erica and Dana went to change and the other 4 got up to get fitted in their dresses next, In her whole Life Steph never thought she would have such a huge wedding party but to her these girls are now family! The girls step out smiling as Erica and Dana do the same doing Cat calls and whistling the girls posing.

 

The girls smiled all loving their dressed and getting them ordered when Erica kicks back and says, "Ok soon to be Mrs. Severide your turn!!" Erica smirks as Steph heads in the back to slip on her dress, when she steps out the girls are in shock and tears fill some eyes.

 

"you guys think that is something, watch what it looks like when the lights are out!!" The dress maker smirks as she turns off the lights in the back.

 

the light comes back on and the girls are smirking, they all say the same of how perfect and stunning the dress is, but as Steph lifts her dress slightly all the girls bust up laughing as she reveals her turn out boots underneath. "I guess you can't take the firefighter out of the girl even on her wedding day!!!" Stella comments as they all laugh harder.

As the day reaches the afternoon and the girls are getting a bit tired when they stop and grab some supper. They are all sitting around the table when Steph pulls out her phone and shows the girls the pictures of the cake and cake cutter and Kelly's grooms Cake. "So since Kelly and I did do some things together here are the cakes and the cutter." Steph smiles

The girls love the pictures as Dana and Erica chuckle "Leave it up to Kelly to have a black cake at the wedding!!" Erica laughs as Dana smirks and the rest laugh. "Ya he said something about there needs to be something manly there!!" Steph giggles "To which I said what aren't you enough and well he pulled me into his arms and started tickling me!"

The girls laugh as they all enjoy the time together as they are getting ready to leave, when they smell smoke coming from the kitchen and it starts to fill the restaurant, The girl's begin to do what they do and help get people out, Stella and Dana are outside with Gabby, Erica and Brett. Stella on the phone with dispatch, as Missy Steph and Katie start to exit, CPD are the first to arrive with firehouse 23 and that's when it happens gun fire starts to ring out as people start running for cover and the girls are seeing Cops and firefighters pegged off one by one injured or killed the girls trying to help as Dana watches where the shots are coming from grabbing her snipper rifle and getting on the top of building next to the restaurant she gets into place and...

*POP* *POP* *POP*

The new character of Erica Cruz is from my good friend BeckyJolene


	12. As the smoke Clears

*POP POP POP*

That was the last sound heard, the smoke began to clear and Dana had come down from the building, She ran over to the girls seeing Gabby, Brett and Missy, and Erica but three were missing. As they cleared the building the firefighter appeared carrying Erica to an awaiting stretcher as Brett ran over to ride in with her so she wasn't alone. The second that came out was Stella being helped by two firefighters but her on her own feet, Gabby went and rode in with her. They hadn't seen Steph yet and that was the last call Dana wanted to make to tell Kelly his fiancee was dead, as the third firefighter carried Steph out, Dana handed Missy her keys as she got into the third ambo that was headed to med. 

A trauma alert was called out at Med as Maggie got the groups ready, they had 2 serious injures coming in and one major, She had both doctor Becker and Rhodes ready to go if surgery was needed, when the first rig pulled in. They wheeled in Katie as the paramedic gave report, "27 year old female GSW to the right shoulder and right thigh, lost about 100 ML of blood, 2 IV lines started with fluids running, Blood pressure 100/78, pulse tachy at 102 respiration 20 and oxygen saturation at 96% on 2 liters of oxygen." Connor noticed her as otis's girl on that stretcher and Kelly's sister so he quickly grabbed it, "I got this!!" I need lab, X Ray and we need a CT stat" Connor bellows out as he looks down as Erica eyes open. "Hey Katie I got you!" Connor smiles down at her, as Katie weakly smiles back "Would this be a bad time to tell you I am pregnant?" Katie looks at him as Connor gets an even more concerned look on his face as they take her right to the OR.

The Second patient in was Stella and Dr Halstead took her to treatment room 3, Stella had a dislocated knee and a few bumps and bruises, She fair the luckiest. As the 3rd ambo pulled in and the doors were thrown open to reveal Dana doing CPR on Steph helping out in the back with the Paramedic. As they pulled the stretcher out, Dana had gotten up on the Stretcher to continue CPR, the medic started to give report, "33 year old female, 2 GSW one to the right hip and the second to the right chest, lung collapsed, pt intubated en route. Lost pulse just before pulling in and have been working the Code." Dr. Choi and Dr Manning took over as they helped Dana down and pushed the extra people from the room. Dana looked as her hands seeing the blood and her eyes started to glaze over as Bosco ran in having heard the commotion on the radio and he grabbed her pulling her close, his hands on her face as he spoke her name and she came back to him. She went to say she needed to call Kelly, as he walked in the door, "WHERE IS MY SISTER AND STEPH!!" Kelly was pissed and scared. 

Dana and missy walked over with Gabby and Brett as they began to explain everything to him, Kelly felt the tears streaming down his face he stood up as Connor appeared to inform them about Katie. "Katie had a through and through GSW to the shoulder that we were able to fix, the second GSW to her thigh had no exit wound and we were able to get the bullet out, her and the Baby are fine and resting upstairs. She is going to be in a cast for awhile as the bullet fractured the femur." Connor stopped and looked at Kelly, Kelly hugged him. "Thank you for saving my sister." Kelly smiled as Dr Becker walked into the waiting room...

Kelly felt Dana on his right side and Gabby to his left, as Casey was behind him. "Steph is in serious condition, the first bullet hit her hip fracturing the hip and having embedded itself there, we were about to remove is and reset her hip. However the GSW to the chest hit her lung and had followed the easy path and it nicked her spine. We were able to remove the bullet and fix her lung and other bleeders, However as of now she has swelling around the cord and when I checked on her as of now she has no feeling from the waist down." Becker watched as Kelly's knees buckled and Casey held him up with Bosco's help as the girls pulled a chair over. "I am so sorry I have to deliver this news also it appeared she was very early in a pregnancy and due to blood loss she lost the child. Again I am very sorry, but with therapy and healing I believe she will walk again." Dr Becker walked away as Kelly just sobbed out his head in his hands as Dana tried to hug him he pushed everyone away, including her. "Don't ok Don't hug me don't touch me!!" Kelly spat venom in his voice as Dana glared at him. "What have I done I never slept with all those women, yes I dated around but I wasn't the man whore you all thought I was. WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS LUCK!" Kelly shouted and half sobbed. "My girl my never walk again, I will still love her no matter what but her not being able to do her job will kill her cause she is much like me, and we lost a child we didn't even know about!!" "We are getting married, and now this, it isn't fair!!" Kelly sobs as Dana finally grabs onto him, him crumbling in her arms. "You two are going to get through this, you are both strong and she needs you right now. So Kelly I know your hurting but you need to put on your game face and see her." Dana looked at him sternly like a mother to a child as Kelly stood and headed to the ICU to her room. He stood in the doorway and looked at her IV's and wires everywhere and he looked at her face so pale and her cheeks wet with tears. Her eyes met his as he stepped in and he went to speak as she spoke first. "I killed our child that I never knew we had, and I may be in a wheelchair forever so Kelly Severide as much as I love you I release you from being burdened with me, you deserve so much more!" she places her ring on the hospital table turning away and starting to cry again as he picks the ring up. "No this belongs on your hand, cause I am going to love you no matter what and you didn't kill out child it is not your fault this happened." Kelly went to put his hands on hers as she pulled away and repeated those words, "I release you from this burden Kelly and you will see clearer once the smoke clears that I did what was best for you!" Steph sobbed as Kelly looked away tears falling, he stepped out to give her space knowing she is upset as he went down to see Katie and told her everything. Katie looked as Otis and demanded a chair to see Steph. 

Katie well she was pissed she asked Steph long ago to not break her brother's heart and now this, as Otis pushed her into the room Katie demanding privacy and Otis stepped out closing the door as Kelly joined him. "You being Stupid!!" Katie started glaring at Steph, "I get that your hurt, your scared and your upset. But pushing Kelly away is not the way to handle it he is so in love with you you are ripping his heart right from his chest." Katie glared at Steph. "Didn't you once say you would kill me if I broke his heart?" Steph still remember their first meeting as katie nodded, "Then please do me that favor and do it." Steph voice was a whisper as Katie moved closer and slapped her hard to the face. "Don't say that, I am sorry I hit you but you are talking non sense!" Katie looked at her as Steph looked to her tears falling "I don't want him to hate me for losing our baby and I don't want to be a burden on him, I love him more than anything but I can't do this to him." Steph cried as Katie took her hand, "Girl he isn't blaming you he wants to hold you and love you through this, Steph that man would be a broken shell without you I can tell you that, and I would miss the strong girl I can't wait to call my sister." Katie let the tears fall "Plus I know it's not the right time but this baby needs their aunt." Katie smiled as Steph smiled hugging her the best she can. "Thank you Katie I guess i need you to slap the shit out of me and knock some sense into me!" Steph smiles as the boys walk in Steph reaching out for Kelly as he kisses her softly putting her ring back on. "I don't ever want to hear that you want to die again, cause I am not ready to stop loving you!" Kelly kissed her tears falling as Otis and Katie sneak out to give them some time to themselves..

Again Erica Cruz belongs to BeckyJolene


	13. I love you always

8 months had passed since the restaurant Kelly and Steph had gotten married, Katir had the baby and married Otis.  
Missy and Mike were doing good they had some rough times and Missy had run to Kelly, Steph understood they were friends, but Missy has taken one of Steph's boyfriends years ago so she had an odd feeling about it recently and she wasn't sure why she was on such high alert.  
I mean ya Missy was beautiful and had said she thought Kelly was hot and did date him for like a month, but she knew in her heart there was nothing but her mind was playing tricks.  
Her and Missy had well had a talk about it and Missy explained everything to her and said she would never make a play for Kelly as she never loved him. She dated him at a low point in her life, she had just lost Gabe who passed away and she ran into Kelly at the bar. They were both drowning their sadness at it was around the same time Steph had left. Missy explained yes they dated, but it was nothing more then that dinners and talking nothing in the physical sense. Missy explained that Kelly even though they dated, well he was really more of her best friend, he helped her to see the world differently and he had introduced her to Mike in a round about way,that is when Missy swore Kelly was nothing more then a best friend, and the man who brought her to her true love. Missy would forever love Kelly for that, cause she found Mike cause of Kelly.   
Steph nodded and apologized for acting so crazy and then explained to Missy how she had been feeling off. 

"Maybe your pregnant?" Missy looked at her across the table at Steph and Kelly's new place the guys out for the day together so the girls could have their talk. 

Steph looks at her completely shocked. "Oh my god Missy I never even thought of that, that could be the reason I freaked and wasn't thinking." Steph sighed feeling even worse for having been mad at her sister. Missy hugged her, "I told you I forgive you and hey I have been there with hormones remember!!" Missy laughs and Steph remembers the times Mike ended up on their couch. 

Steph took her advise and had gone and seen the doctor and got her blood drawn, Steph was sitting home thinking about if she is how she is going to tell Kelly, they had only been married 6 months she had to of gotten pregnant on the honeymoon. While she was waiting for the phone call Katie and Erica came walking in and sat down katie holding her sweet little boy.

"So Kelly called cause he was worried on the conversation you and Missy were having and you thought he still had a thing for her!!" Katie looked at her, "I am here to say he doesn't he never did have feelings for her it was always you girl He loves you and always will." Steph nods at her sister in law. "I know Missy and I talked and cleared up the misunderstanding the story was misconstrued by the new firefighter Jake who made things up." Steph jumped as her phone rang and she answered keeping her answers short. 

"Steph who was that?" Erica asked as she hung up the phone noticing her friend had tears in her eyes and she looked pale. "My Doctor calling with the blood test results." Steph looked at the girls as she looked panicked, "Don't tell me your dying or something!!" Katie looks worried "Missy was right my moods and believing that story was connected to my hormones." Steph looked at her "I am Pregnant!" Steph couldn't believe the words she was speaking as the girls looked at her shocked and smiled. 

"We have to figure out a surprising way to tell Kelly, I will call Dana to come and help with Missy!" Erica smiles as she heads off to make her phone calls. 

Hours later.....

The girls had come up with a plan to tell Kelly he is going to be a dad, they had cleared out the room next to Kelly and Steph's that had a joining door for easy access to the baby and they put a chair in there with a table and a box. Kelly had been dropped off by Cruz and Erica and Katie and Dana had left for this to be a private moment. Kelly walked in reading a note on the counter telling him to go into the office As Kelly walked in he saw all that was now in there was a chair and a table he was confused and sat down. "Steph honey?!?" Steph came around the corner smiling as she saw him. "Where did the office go?" He questioned as she smiled,"Well the girls and I thought it would be better off the living room in that extra room we didn't know what to do with cause we are going to need this room!" She smiles and he looked at her odd, she handed him the box. 

"Open this and it will answer all the questions I see written on your face." Steph smiled as she stood next to him. Kelly opened the box finding a note as he unfolded it, it read:

"You told mommy you needed a candidate and one is on the way for you to train in the family business, I will arrive for duty on Oct 2018." Kelly looked at Steph tears falling down his cheeks as he spoke. "I am going to be a father?" She nodded as he jumped up spinning her around hugging her kissing her softly. "Steph I love you always no one but you!!!" Kelly smiled watching her. "How far along are you?" Kelly asked as Steph smiled "8 weeks!" Kelly smiled as he placed a soft kiss on her still flat stomach. "Daddy can not wait to see you for the first time I love you and your mom more then life itself." Kelly got up and kissed his wife softly they were going to have a family and he couldn't wait. But what was yet to come for them they didn't know!!!

 

Ok everyone this is the end of book one and I will be starting book 2 soon I hope you guys come back for book two and find out what happens with steph and kelly... Erica Cruz belongs to BeckyJolene


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